The practice of asking God questions, like all the principles in this chapter, applies to every stage, not just one stage in particular, and it can touch several stages at the same time.
Getting still and quiet is often key. Romance doesn’t happen in a drive-through; it happens by candlelight. So make a reservation. Set aside time to step into a place of beauty and stillness—the woods, a lakeshore, a hiking trail, a porch, or just a quiet place in your home. You may want to take a pen and notebook with you.
Take a few deep breaths and say out loud, “Here I am, God.” Ask the Father to show you and tell you who you are and what you mean to him. Invite him to love you. And then . . . pay attention.
Walk with God back into your story. Listen for how you were trained to see particular aspects of it. For example, how were you trained to see love? What agreements and vows did you make about love?
Search your heart for answers to, and illustrations of, what you have come to believe about your value and significance. Are you worth loving? Were you worth Christ’s dying for? If the answer is anything other than yes and yes, then something isn’t right. What is blocking your ability to receive God’s love? Whatever it is, guaranteed, it is also blocking your ability to send love out.
All of these are good questions. Others will occur to you—questions that come to you from your heart and life experiences. What counts is this: Ask God.
Ask him.
Then listen and watch for his response.
This isn’t supposed to be novel but, rather, normal.
