For many years, I believed my life with God was like turning in a paper every Sunday to be graded. I would get somewhere between a C+ and D− and be sent away to try, try again. But no matter how hard I tried, I just wasn’t enough. God loved me, sure, but he was mostly disappointed with me.
Believing those lies made for a very confused boy who grew into a man. Ministry seemed a good place to sign on and show God I was serious about him. Maybe, just maybe, he would raise my grade. It didn’t work, but I kept on trying. Not until I broke the bondage of the lies could the love set in, and it was so good! But—and it’s a thrill to say this - it wasn’t as if I started making straight A’s. It was more like God tore up all my papers and report cards and then threw his arms around me, pulled me close, and whispered,
“I was so looking forward to when you were going to let that go.”
An excerpt from The Heart of a Warrior Journal Workbook.
