Your Love is better than life. You are the well that won’t run dry. I have tasted and I have seen, you are better than all these things.
Pat Barret, Better
When life doesn’t go my way, here are some of the things I reach for to cope and distract:
- Clean the garage.
- Spend money.
- Yell.
- Eat.
- Drink something.
- Go to work.
- Work out.
Why? Because doing these things lets me feel in control, or heard, or numb, or productive, or strong. The point is, I can sometimes temporarily escape negative thoughts and feelings about my circumstances by attempting to retreat into something I falsely assume I have control over. Doing so let’s me feel, for a fleeting moment or two, good about my life and myself. It satiates temporarily a much deeper hunger. However, it’s a short-lived relief, a momentary retreat from not feeling so bad. It is not a solution; at best it’s an aspirin, but it’s not a cure.
Take your heart to Jesus. For two minutes, take a breath, quiet your heart and mind, and ask Jesus to reveal where you go for comfort and control: Jesus, where do I take my hunger that is apart from you?
Jesus, you alone satisfy. You alone fill my hunger for life. I bring my need to you again. Come, Jesus. Show me how you alone satisfy. Amen.
An excerpt from The Heart of a Warrior Journal Workbook.