So, what do your kids need from you in the fight for their hearts? Above all, they need you—the real you, the authentic you.
That all starts by getting back your own heart. As you do, you’ll become increasingly equipped to hear and validate your kids in the questions they’re asking. They’re the same ones you were asking when you were a boy:
Do you see me?
Do you love what you see?
Do you want to be with me?
Whether your son or daughter is still a child or a grown man or woman, I guarantee that, one way or another, they, too, are asking these core questions. Are the answers settled in your heart as yes, yes, and yes? If not, then it’s extremely likely they are not settled that way in your child’s heart either.
Becoming a beloved son as you father is the way to learn how to father beloved sons and daughters. Being loved is the way to learn how to love. Being healed is the way to learn how to partner with God for your children’s healing when you or someone else wounds them. Being fathered by God is the greatest way to learn how to father the hearts he has entrusted to you.
On the timeline of your children’s life experiences, your love comes before God’s. You are their first authority figure. How you handle their hearts shapes their ability to love and trust others. Either your love will help them make an intimate connection with God or your wounding will encumber it.
How do you wish your father had loved you? The key to loving your own kids better may well be contained in your answer to that question.
As you ponder all this with God today, consider asking Him:
Father, where have I taken my questions, do you see me? And do you love what you see? Would you show me how you see me?
Jesus, what do I still want and hope for from my father?
(if he has passed on, what would you have liked to have heard from your dad?)
Holy Spirit, open my eyes to the next steps you have for me in fighting for the hearts of my kids? What are a few things I can start practicing to answer their questions, Do you see me, do you love what you see?
Scripture:
The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” - Jeremiah 31:3 NIV
She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,” for she said, “I have now seen the One who sees me.” - Genesis 16:13 NIV
You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. - Psalm 139:1-3 NIV
